Help, help, I'm having an existential post-modern crisis!
Woke up in the middle of the night thinking: I'm just no good at this. I'm crap in lab, I have no money, I don't go out much, I'm not a great friend - so what's the point? I don't think I can do this. I could opt out - I could just quit the race.
I don't want to quit. I just wish it weren't such a struggle.
I always used to think that Camus's assertion that the only serious philosophical question was suicide was ridiculous. But I sort of see his point. Why even bother?
Except that I think that one's life makes its own meaning, in conjunction with other lives . . . So I guess the answer to Camus (which I realize now, later in the morning, was more or less his answer anyway) is, "Why not?"
To be or not to be . . . Oy. That is the question.
Is rationalism my religion? Rational absurdism, let's call it, or absurd rationalism, if you prefer.
Here is a Socratic dialog between a camel and a llama.
Camel: Life is a bit shit. Why not just kill ourselves now? [Spits.]
Llama: Well, it's better than nothing, which is our only other option. [Chews cud.]
Camel: But, I mean, why bother doing anything if it's not clear that there's any meaning in it? Or if you're not doing it very well?
Llama: You have something better to do?
Camel: But if there's no meaning, if there's no truth! It's difficult and painful . . . I cannot believe in the God and Satan that those people on Pax talk about . . . Having looked over the edge into nothingness, how can I continue to bop along my merry way? [Chews cud.] There's no absolute truth! There's no ineffable meaning!
Llama: [Spits.] So make some! You have a brain, and a mouth, and eyes to see, and feet to take you around, and hands to work with - or hooves anyway - and a nose to smell the delicate scent of the sea, and ears which can hear music, and a heart that can love and be loved . . . You have all this and you're busy asking silly questions? Honestly - you've got a jar full of quarters and you're worried that they're not shiny enough. Enjoy beauty - enjoy pain, even - not because there's any reason to do it but because you may as well. Appreciate your life - and that gives it all the meaning it could ever need.
Oh - if only metaphysical revelations were more useful at the lab bench.
Woke up in the middle of the night thinking: I'm just no good at this. I'm crap in lab, I have no money, I don't go out much, I'm not a great friend - so what's the point? I don't think I can do this. I could opt out - I could just quit the race.
I don't want to quit. I just wish it weren't such a struggle.
I always used to think that Camus's assertion that the only serious philosophical question was suicide was ridiculous. But I sort of see his point. Why even bother?
Except that I think that one's life makes its own meaning, in conjunction with other lives . . . So I guess the answer to Camus (which I realize now, later in the morning, was more or less his answer anyway) is, "Why not?"
To be or not to be . . . Oy. That is the question.
Is rationalism my religion? Rational absurdism, let's call it, or absurd rationalism, if you prefer.
Here is a Socratic dialog between a camel and a llama.
Camel: Life is a bit shit. Why not just kill ourselves now? [Spits.]
Llama: Well, it's better than nothing, which is our only other option. [Chews cud.]
Camel: But, I mean, why bother doing anything if it's not clear that there's any meaning in it? Or if you're not doing it very well?
Llama: You have something better to do?
Camel: But if there's no meaning, if there's no truth! It's difficult and painful . . . I cannot believe in the God and Satan that those people on Pax talk about . . . Having looked over the edge into nothingness, how can I continue to bop along my merry way? [Chews cud.] There's no absolute truth! There's no ineffable meaning!
Llama: [Spits.] So make some! You have a brain, and a mouth, and eyes to see, and feet to take you around, and hands to work with - or hooves anyway - and a nose to smell the delicate scent of the sea, and ears which can hear music, and a heart that can love and be loved . . . You have all this and you're busy asking silly questions? Honestly - you've got a jar full of quarters and you're worried that they're not shiny enough. Enjoy beauty - enjoy pain, even - not because there's any reason to do it but because you may as well. Appreciate your life - and that gives it all the meaning it could ever need.
Oh - if only metaphysical revelations were more useful at the lab bench.
posted by Joolya at
1:24 PM
3 Comments:
Hi,
Followed one of your comments from Pooflingers, and started reading.
Please, please, please may I quote your camel-llama dialogue? I want it for my blog over at http://www.livejournal.com/users/luna_the_cat/.
wow! thanks! as long as you give me credit, it's all good.
Oh my post-modern nothing! I cant believe how accurately and sussinctly expressed what I've been grappling with for some time now, I've come to more or less the same conclusion myself to to see it put in such a clear and humorous manner -I love it! Thank you for making it so clear, thanks for helping me deal with my silly questions!
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