Tales From The Fourth Floor
Springy has taken to watching FoxNews, from what I can only imagine is some masochistic impulse on his part. (Similar to how I occasionally read VoxDay and My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy.)
Alan Colmes is the Crypt Keeper. No?
No, he totally is.
Ick.
Sean Hannity is some sort of stitched together audio-animatronic type thingy from hell.
"I could do so much better than Colmes," Springy says. "He's just gawking, he's not even asking any pertinent questions."
"Of course you could," I say, "but they'd never have you on as the Colmes person because you'd just upstage Hannity every single time, as he is an idiot. Colmes has got to be more of an idiot than Hannity to make Hannity look good."
"He's a mole!" cries Springy, of Crypt Keeper Colmes. "He's a conservative who is just pretending to be a liberal to make liberals look bad!"
Probably Springy is right.
No, fuck that, he is totally right. I mean left. Heh heh heh. Bloody socialist Brits.
Alan Colmes is the Crypt Keeper. No?
No, he totally is.
Ick.
Sean Hannity is some sort of stitched together audio-animatronic type thingy from hell.
"I could do so much better than Colmes," Springy says. "He's just gawking, he's not even asking any pertinent questions."
"Of course you could," I say, "but they'd never have you on as the Colmes person because you'd just upstage Hannity every single time, as he is an idiot. Colmes has got to be more of an idiot than Hannity to make Hannity look good."
"He's a mole!" cries Springy, of Crypt Keeper Colmes. "He's a conservative who is just pretending to be a liberal to make liberals look bad!"
Probably Springy is right.
No, fuck that, he is totally right. I mean left. Heh heh heh. Bloody socialist Brits.
posted by Joolya at
9:55 PM
2 Comments:
Haha! He is a mole. But moles are usually in the opposition's organisation without them noticing, and as Colmes is a conservative at a conservative TV station pretending to be a liberal, we need a new word. How about the acronym "DROLL," to signify a Deceptive Republican of Outwardly Liberal Leanings. This has a satisfying proximity to "troll."
I always come off as a bit of a smug wanker on your blog, don't I? But I do think I could do better than Colmes, he's hopeless.
Note: Springy is only a tiny little bit smug, and only occasionally at that.
He's really pretty cute.
If consumptive.
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