doors and drawers

doors and drawers, those are my problems. every day i have to open and close so many doors and drawers. to get from my desk to the bathroom: 3 doors. from my desk to the gym: 4 doors and one elevator. to set up one restriction digest: three freezer doors, one drawer, one door. doors and drawers; it never ends!

i asked my therapist if everyone notices the doors and drawers that confound and define their every move. she reckons i notice them more when i am feeling depressed or anxious. well, duh. but i can't ever seem to edit them out of my day.

you read a novel and people come and go all the time but they rarely mention opening doors, pushing, pulling, straining, bumping into the frames, juggling the coffee cups or the test tube racks. they never mention the toilet paper coming or not coming smoothly out of the holder, or the different kinds of drink cup lids at the different cafes, or the hum of the fluorescent lights on the water-stained ceiling tiles. they leave out the doors and the drawers, but i notice every single one and they all affect me. the dizzying accumulation of mundane details - that's what gets me.

(i think i might be getting a migraine.)